Change your life…Today!

May 30, 2011 at 6:02 pm (Uncategorized)

Hi Everyone,

A while ago, I posted about doing things that will change your life. A lot of times we get mired down in the day to day things and we tend to forget the things that are important.  One of these things is continuing to grow.  True living stops when we stay stagnant.  Stagnation begins with holding on to things that are no longer helping us grow. 

One of these things for me was the relationship I had with my biological father.  My parents divorced when I was three years old and because of that my father wasn’t around much.  He has always lived at least three hours away, a lot of times more than that.   Even when I did spend time with my father, I always felt like I was competing for his attention.  A lot of my childhood was spent trying to make him happy with me and wishing that he was the type of dad that I saw on tv.  

I grew up with The Cosby Show, Growing Pains and Family Ties.  In those shows, the fathers were always hands-on and really cared about how their kids were doing.  So, it was hard to understand as a child why my father didn’t seem to want to spend time with me.  Most of the visits I had with him, I spent with my grandmother or my aunt.  As I grew up, I began to expect less and less from my father.  In all honesty, I felt like he didn’t really love me.    From what I saw, my father was always better with kids that weren’t his.  With me, it felt like he saw me as a burden – something that he HAD to do.

Eventually, as I grew into an adult, I had to accept the fact that he would never be the father that I wanted.  Along the way, we have tried to rebuild a couple of times, but it always comes back to the same fact.  My father will never change.  I can continue to let that cloud my life with pain or I can let it go.  I can move on and build a life that I am proud of.

My point is this…Everyone has a past.  Many times we have painful issues from our past that we have to deal with.  But we can’t let them hold us back from continuing to live.  We can’t continue to wish that things would change.  I was watching an episode of Dr. Drew and one of the patients said “I just want my dad to love me and want to spend time with me.”  One of the counselors said “You didn’t get that.”  We can’t become stagnant because we wish things from our past will change.  They won’t.  We each have our own baggage that we have acquired over the years.   It’s your job to unpack that baggage and move on with your life.  Don’t let it weigh you down to the point that you can’t travel anymore.

So, what are you going to let go of?  I can speak from experience when I say you will feel much lighter.  And, always remember, you can change your life.  You can be anything you want to be.  BUT you have to give yourself the power to be that.

Enjoy life!





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